Dreams

Life sucks. It was never meant to be like this. I had dreams and they are fading away. I write this as i play poker and frankly nothing better describes the cul de sac that i'm in. all i hope is that somehow something will come through for me. i remember thinking it will get better once i'm old enough, where i'm at this point in my life, but i'd fucked up. it just didn't get any better, the pain just became more bearable and i became more tolerant of it. nothing more depressing than looking at my self in the mirror and being dissapointed it's not the person I had in my head. I wanted everything to feel like the movies, but now i bleed just to know i'm alive.